2021 Mid-year Reflections

 

We are half-way through the year! What an amazing feat, I'd say. How have we been? Is the year so far what we've imagined and hoped for?

I'd like to make a check-in for myself as well. I've been reading through my previous blog entries this year, particularly my 2021 bullet journal and goal setting ideas entry, wherein I shared about being at peace with not having high expectations, but just constantly pushing myself to be better in some aspects of my life, little by little. 

I remember feeling a bit challenged with coming up with goals for the year, but now I realize that there are many things that are out of my control and how there's still so much to learn even if I didn't write it down on my list of goals. 

I sometimes surprise myself with things I never expected I'd be able to experience during this time. Overall no matter what kind of experience it is, what's always important is to keep an open mind and learn. Allow me to share more, through four main aspects--

Work

Most days earlier in the year, I would wake up and tell myself: I'll take it easy today. But despite my best efforts, it almost always never happens. It just seemed like work was all there is in life, and it started to be like that again last June. And maybe every other day now in July, but I think I've gotten better. 

Better at taking breaks. Better at feeling comfortable with taking them. Better at evaluating when there's already too much on my plate. Better at identifying which work matters to me. Better at reframing the way I communicate with all stakeholders. Better with knowing that I'm highly capable, more than what I believe on some days. Better at celebrating my wins (v important, friends.). 

I celebrated my 4th year work anniversary last month, and I'm grateful. There's really no such thing as an easy job, which is why we get compensated in exchange for our service. At the end of the day, it really is just one aspect of life. 

Life

Which brings me to talk about life. I may have mentioned this elsewhere, but whenever I think about life, I just think that I'd simply like to cherish every waking and sleeping moment of it. 

From time to time, I would bring out my old hard drive, which is filled with films I've watched in college. I'd go through the list, choose one, and hit play. I would remember some details of when I first watched a certain film such as: who I watched it with, what I was eating, and when I watched it (was it during one of my long breaks, or late into the night?). I would feel some sort of nostalgia, yet I know I won't be able to bring back the very moment I had from before. I may have watched it with a friend, I may have been eating popcorn, or we may have been watching it after a night out of drinking, but now is a different season. I must've enjoyed the film before as a student, but now I also enjoy it differently, or it may be teaching me a thing or two that I didn't realize during the first time. 

An instance such as this always brings me back to the present moment, because I may not have the same one again, and it'll likely turn out different next time. Which is why I try my best to be at peace with where I am, where I'm going, even if I might not have all the answers. 

Hobbies

This year so far, I grew sunflowers, got into hand building pottery, got back into watching anime, consistently shared about my Recent Loves, and so on. I've shared about the lessons I've learned on having multiple hobbies, and one thing I left out was that, I learned I can be satisfied with being by myself. 

I've known this about myself since a couple years back, especially when I started working. But then it was during this pandemic time that I felt it was emphasized further. I love being with family and friends, but during this time that I'm not able to see extended family or go out on trips with friends as much as I really want to, I've learned how to be my own friend. 

It's nice to be on video calls with friends for sure, but it's just nice to have because I can't expect my friends to always be available. I understand we're all going through a strange time and we're all coping in our own ways. I'll be there of course to listen or chat, if ever anyone reaches out. : - )

Relationships

Which brings me to the topic of relationships. I've been on the look out for ways to spend more meaningful time with my parents. I still live in their house and I see them everyday, although as you can imagine from the WFH setup, I'm always inside my room, working. We may be with our families or significant others more often, however that doesn't automatically mean we are spending time meaningfully. 

For my relationship with my parents, I find that inviting my dad to go on brisk walks with me allows us to have more lengthy conversations. It also benefits me, because he walks fast and I always have to keep up, which makes the brisk walking session a highly effective one. With my mom, I watch Annabelle Gao's vlogs with her, to the point that she already knows the other people in her life. She also shares a bit of her insights, what she thinks, and she also tells me she likes watching Annabelle's travel videos the most. Moments shared like these are precious.

With friends, I've been going out for walks with them around the neighborhood whenever they're free, I hop on calls after work so we can express how tired we are about corporate life (but lol, just kidding, we need stability and money), we send each other cakes, we do online shopping together, and we play online escape room games. All these things, with no pressure. Only when able and when in the mood.  

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How is the year so far for you, dear reader? : - ) I hope that it has been filled with learnings as well, and memories to keep. Thank you for spending your time with me on here.

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