Tuesday, December 11, 2018

What I Think About When I Think About Gifts

Giving gifts, receiving gifts. I love getting gifts, though I suck at giving them.

I think this stems from my thinking that I didn't have much to give back when I was still a student. I never really did shop for gifts much before because I didn't want to spend my parents' money to get stuff for people; it just didn't feel right. I can't give what I don't have, after all. But then now as a working woman, I think it just came naturally that this is the time for giving back. I'm blessed to give back.

Another factor to consider is that my Love Language is definitely not gifts. I like receiving them, but giving them is a struggle. But then I wanted to challenge myself this year.

So way back in November, I started listing down the people I want to give gifts to. Just my family and closest friends. I don't feel obliged to give gifts to everyone I know, and we shouldn't. I also then set a budget. How much am I willing to spend, and is this value-adding to their life?

Okay, so on to the questions I ponder upon:

1) Is this useful, will they use it, or will they just let it rot in a corner of their room?

2) What's this person's interest? Do they like this particular color?

3) What makes them happy? If they see this, can I imagine their face light up with enthusiasm?

I then set out to squeeze in some mall time after work. I walk around the mall from store to store, check the prices to see if I can get it in a cheaper place yet with the same quality. I realized that this process takes time and wrestling with my own inner thoughts. This time around I just didn't want to come up to the person and ask them: so what do you like to get for Christmas? However tempting it may be.

It's led me to really think about the person. Doing this reminded me of what this person means to me and how much I appreciate them. This can also led me to realize that maybe I don't know the person quite fully yet. I don't see this as a bad thing though, but maybe something to work on by spending more time with them. I think we also have those friends that we may not know what their favorite colors are; those basic things don't seem so basic after all.

After all this, I can say that gift giving isn't so bad after all, and I shouldn't think I suck because I know I've placed a considerable amount of time and effort, and it'll always be the thought that counts.

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